Friday the 31st

pg ni Big Cleaning Day :)

we had breakfast @ the gallery - mihun and kuih2.

kemas2 tempat kerja and kerja @ the same time is not so good idea :p because at last meja kerja aku bersepah balik!

tengahhari went out to warta. just walking around, window shopping..kami masing2 punyela takde minyak(kereta) masih mau jalan2 :) so, i was suggesting that why don't we just stay @ the office? much more convenient..kite boleh layan movie(s) but unfortunately, the girls doesn't wat to do so..kami setuju collect RM 2 from each person and topup minyak kereta annyss :p

pastu jalan la gi warta..i bought a pair of shoe- sebijik macam ibu mengandung punya..haha janji selesa!

only RM 10.00 very nice :) nanti aku amik gamba uplod dlm nih :p

tgok blog ddy td..UTP tutop?H1N1..bile UNITEN nak tutop eh...

neway, sok janji dgn mama nak bawak dy jln2 g bli kain / baju rayer..rasmikan keretaku. tp pagi cam biasalah, jogging dulu! :)

biTTer heaRT

Sun rays come down as seen when they hit the ground, Children spinning around till they fall down down down.I wait for you: it's been two hours now,You're still somewhere in town,Your dinners getting cold.I rest my case you are always this late,And you know how much I hate waiting around 'round 'round, Bitter heart, bitter heart tries to keep it all inside, Bitter heart, bitter heart shadows will help you try to hide,Bitter heart, my bitter heart is gettin' just a little fragile,Bitter heart, bitter heart of mine.And then you come and tell me the same reason as you did yesterday,So tell me whats her name. Doo doo da dum, doo doo da dum, doo doo doo doo doo doo da da dum dum, da da da da dum, da da da da dum, da da da da dum.Bitter heart, bitter heart tries to keep it all insideBitter heart, bitter heart shadows will help you try to hide, Bitter heart, my bitter heart is just getting a little fragile, Bitter heart, bitter heart of mine, of mine, of mine, of mine, of mine, of mine.

~~little journeys :)~~

blog dearie...

this morning i was late for work. @ five this morn was rainin cats and dogs. it didn't stops until 6.30. i wake-up late and rushing to prepare myself for work :) i find myself aching here and there after yesterday's jogging. hmmph..(sigh~~) but you have to what you have to do, right? kalo tak sebab doc's advice, takde nye aku buat seme2 nih! buat penat badan :p as long as i'm happy with my body then it doesn't matter anymore. buut i'm quite agree with Ben (a long time friend) if the doc has said so then, u have to do it no matter what..bukan salah i kalau i rase nervous waktu check pressure!! haha

breakfast @ the masjid. ate nasi kerabu. rindunya kat Dungun. rindunya kat kenangan masa aku hidup kat Dungun. tapi tiap kali terkenang, hati ade rase sikit getar..hmm, mcm rase berdebar2 tunggu sarung cincin... :) (boleh ke buat misal gitu??!) anyway, i enjoyed my day today. running a little bit there and here. rasenya aku nampak Ameer Zaim, a long time ago friend too..maybe he work here somewhere. tak sempat nak tegur ke nak buat2 tegur ke.. he was with his friend, and i was with Annyss, Daya, Ain and Afni. huhus, hampir je accident time on the way. ade pulak mamat Africa tu tak reti bawak kreta? tetibe menguundur time bukit! ini lulus licence ke tak ni? aku hon..(hehe, lepas gian nak tekan hon panjang.. :p)

half an hour before lunch time, Ben msg ajak lunch. pusing punye pusing, last2 masjid juge jadik pilihan. ape lagi, masakan asam tetel & ikan pari jadi pilihan. layan gak ar! it seems like most of the people i know are having post-breakup syndrome! ape nih?? musim kut... i am truly wishing everybody (my dear friends) will always happy, bahagia, dengan pasangan memasing.. i have been there -post breakup blalalala...and it was not a nice experience :p wek!

puas ati la dpt cerita2 dengan Ben..thanks Ben for the treat, tho..next time aku plak belanje ko!

abis lunch, belikan air kelapa untuk ibu mengandung..hehe

petang jog lagi..huhu, skarang jam 7.30mlm and i am really2 stinky! blog punye pasal sanggup nih! :(

dah la aku dah penat..jumpe esok :P!

happy-happy day..

hUsh hUsh

Oooooh oooohI never needed you to be strong
I never needed you for pointin' out my wrongs
i never needed pain,i never needed strain.
My love for you was strong enough you should've known.
I never needed you for judgement
I never needed you to question what i spent
I never asked for help, I take care of myself, I don't know why you think you got a hold on me.
And it's a little in the conversations
There isn't anything that you can say.
And my eyes hurt, hands shiver, so look at me and listen to me because,
I don't want to
Stay another minute
I don't want you
To say a single word
Hush Hush, Hush Hush
There is no other way
I get the final say
Because
I don't want to
Do this any longer
I don't want you
There's nothing left to say
Hush Hush, Hush Hush
I've already spoken
Our love is broken
Baby Hush Hush
I never needed your corrections
On everything from how i act to what i say
i never needed words, i never needed hurt, i never needed you to be there everyday
I'm sorry for the way i let go
Of everything i wanted when you came along
But i am never beaten, broken, not defeated
I know next to you is not where i belong
And it's a little late for explanations
There isn't anything that you can do
And my eyes hurt, hands shiver, so you will listen when i say

No more words
No more lies
No more crying
No more pain
No more hurt
No more tryin'

Smug

it's monday. i arrived at 7.20am. what a record :p i drove 'the car'. that's why i went to work early. alhamdulillah..jalan tak jem, nyehehe..

being the first to arrive is not so much actually :) hm, i found the little fish dead while i switch the fountain on. kesiannya...dah kembung perutnya.

last night i missed him so much. all of the things we went through together runs through my mind. it's not a surprise that those memories do bring tears to my eyes :( hmmmmmmm...

7 Secret to Success

I found the answers in my room... :)

1. ROOF SAID: AIM HIGH

2. FAN SAID: BE COOL

3. CLOCK SAID: EVERY MINUTE IS PRECIOUS

4. WINDOW SAID:SEE THE WORLD

5. MIRROR SAID: REFLECT BEFORE YOU ACT

6. CALENDER SAID: BE UP-TO-DATE

7. DOOR SAID: PUSH HARD TO ACHIEVE YOUR GOALS!

thanks to dDy.. :)

Your view on yourself: You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for: You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true. Your readiness to commit to a relationship: You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love: Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education: Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you: You’re a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success: You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of: You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self: You are mature, reasonable, and honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

PTD

when i heard of other people's luck what did i feel...

Ecah got a call to attend PTD examination from JPA. mom said, lucky her. but for me, lucky is when you are able to see the face of your loved ones everyday. to be able to talk to them everyday. to be able to touch them everyday :)

i believe ALLAH has planned the best for each and everyone of us. nothing to be jealous about. so, i don't feel jealousy at all :)

last night i watched 'KL Lights'. a sitcom. they were using mixed language i.e, 80% english and 20% malays. for a starters, i thing that show was interesting. easy to understand and the characters was potrayed by Naz, Daphne, hmm...and few others who i didn't care to remember their name. but they were good! i enjoyed the show :)
7.45am

i was just comin back from our Friday lunch break. makan kat kedai mamak in Precinct Diplomatik, Putrajaya. MAK AI!!Mahal gila! :( menyesal tak pegi McDee je td :( can u imagine, maggi goreng ayam n lemon iced tea costs me RM 8?! i can get one regular set of Big Mac taw! :( huhuhu...
2.45pm

nak balik dah :) akhirnya...tomorrow i'll be coming to do some schoolwork in the office outside the office hours :p hehe.
i have gotten my matrix card early this week. thanks to bro jae. semangat nih nak gi skolah lusa!
what else huh, hmm..am i goin to drive new car or old car? tak confident la :) nantilah...
ok, me out!-peace!
6.23pm

Zero Gravity

hmm, that is the name of the song i am hearing right now. it was sang by David Archuleta. a cute boy who won a place in American Idol :p

we finished our English Course this afternoon. all in all, I'm enjoying this course from the start until the end. during the end of the session, Ms. Kit gave me and Mr. M.Nasir chocolate for being active participants. all of the group got a hamper of their own and we split it all equally :)

returning to my office after the tea-break, i remembered that this afternoon i met kak Maslin and Cik Nommi. both of them are my client. one was in the country for few weeks for her husband's job updates and the other was here for final goodbye before flying off tonight to New Zealand.

seeing them makes myself determine to finish up my studies as soon as i can. i want to earn this degree for mama and baba plus my adik-adik. hmm, my lovely sisters and handsome brother. it has been quite sometime that we didn't sit and spend time together for Sob's away for he is currently working his ass off in Dengkil.

one of my sis is currently studying in UTP, Tronoh. she's in second year. the last time we visited her in TKC, Seremban. hmm, all in all she was and will be away from the family for ten consecutive years, ma!! hmm, DJ..no wonder you are a little bit off somewhere! hahaha

one sis is working in my hometown (alhamdulillah!) so she stayed at home with us :)

and the last sis, will be having her PMR this year. hmm, time flies isn't it? and sometimes i still have a feeling like I'm in a zero gravity! come on babe, wake up and smell the coffee. people move on and so am i. people meet up and people depart. people come and people go. nothing we do can stop or interfere with the course of life of each living and breathing human being in this world :)

What An Ending...

fuhh, what a day :( my second day of English Course. Miss Kit was very good with her class. i believe that each of us do have our own chance to speak up..

8.00 am to 5.30 pm was nice.. i just got back from the course and my phone rang. as usual i pick it up and said hello, how may i help him. he introduced himself and i recognize him as the husband of one of my client who are currently pursuing her studies in New Zealand.

his tone of voice is quite menacing and i don't even had the chance to defend myself! for a solid half an hour, he let out his feelings and concern about his wife and kids in New Zealand. he is now in Malaysia, working (or should i say finding new job). i heard he quit his old job for the sake of his wife studying oversea.

he said that we (all of us in my department) 'buat kerja main-main'...and he said that i am not serious in handling my job. i was speechless. i mouthed to Ain to call for my Officer and coaxing that man to speak to my Officer instead.

after i pass that line to her, i cried. while listening to him, i remembered my client's face and her hopes before she left for New Zealand. i have known the name, i have known the face, i spoke to her, dealing matters with her..when her husband put it like that, i can imagine how is she coping at the land far away. and i feel for her. it is not that i didn't put myself in her shoes but i myself have this procedure to follow. i myself have the management to refer to. and i myself got my own officers to be reported to!

the way he said it all makes me feel really like the most cruel human being in the world. as if I'm heartless bitch, working to process his wife's study allowances. the way he put it as if I'm not human at all, couldn't really feel for others :'(

this really make me sad. maybe tonight I'll be heaving diarrhea again as i did last night. yesterday was due to the theft case. and today...

is there more should we expect from this life, huh?

sfzy

Basic English Course

i'll be in a three days course starting today. our trainer, Puan Aida is a MAS VSS after 27 years of servicing and now doing translation.
it started ok, with ice braeking and so on..participants came from various TNB's anak syarikat. and they hardly speaks English. what a pity, most of them i can see they were from East Coast. the shyness is still there. it was very hard for me to communicate with them. but i tried, at least i've done my part. it is actually their part to speak up and break the barriers themselves.
after lunch, we found out that Puan Aida's laptop was missing. what an embarrasment! and here we are, UNITEN Generates Professionals...and professionals in what? theft?? OMG :(
i don't know where to put my face, as if i was the one who done that. mengapa la ALLAH tak gerakkan hati untuk kunci pintu kelas tadi...
i really hope that the thief will realize and return the laptop back. so everybody will be happy again..

life in a blink..blink..blink

What was i seeking in this so called life? satisfactions? happiness? perfection?
nobody wanted to be in a failure state, distressful.. people said that life is like a wheel. sometimes we’re up and sometimed we’re down. but not for me, i don’t think so. more to a life-long education process. where mistakes made, forgiven and try again. in the attempt of striding through this life, alhamdulillah it has been a lot that i’ve learnt, seen, heard, read about and felt…
nobody wants to face the same experience twice! especially when it is not favorable to us, of course. what we can do each tiem we face everyday, embrace it and make the best of it No, we cannot freeze the moment. but Yes, we can make that moment lasts forever and keep it beating, live it and re-live that experiences in our hearts.
when i see that tree outside of the surau (i’m @ the surau the moment i wrote this) i was thinking like how long it has been for the tree to grow there. what it had seen for all its life as a big tree at the main intersection between the mosque, and the main road of Sungai Kantan. hmm…it may have seen a gruesome accidents. hundreds maybe..or it had once or two be a shelter for the orphans, or schoole children who has finish their daily classess. or it might have been a witness for a group of bride’s escorts on their way to the reception..haha, who will ever know?!
as a living, breathing, moving flesh of human…with the akal (most valuable gift of intelligence from ALLAH)…supposedly our experience is much, much more than that tree by the main road intersection in Sungai Kantan!
have we ever put our mind to it, what will ever happen tomorrow, the week after, two month later…three years after that? have it crossed our little mind that our dreams that we built can went down the drain?
if and only if we take time to acknowledge our origins, we will definatelybe the most humble human being in the world.

silly me..

this is me lookin silly with dearest Elmo @ Alamanda.

it is alright to be silly once an a while.

doing silly, silly things with my girlfriends :)

it makes me feel good!

a piece of advice :)

Saye Banyak gak dengar nasihat owg yg experience. Tp pendapat sendiri adalah jauh lebih penting, ma. Kalau tanpa dia kamu rase ssh hati, mungkin both of u are destined to be frenz 1st. u kno wat I mean? But, wateva it is, jgn nyesal dgn ape pun kptsn yg kamu dah buat...

from sis to sis. from woman to woman. from human to human. from heart to heart :)


i'd love to share the picture i'm currently using as my wallpaper on the desktop :) the above pic is a picture of three swans resting on a lake..can you see the image they potray? three elephants :) walaupun imej yg ditonjolkan begitu digeruni (elephant), sbnrnya kamu (swan) adalah makhluk yg ALLAH ciptakan penuh dengan kelembutan, gracefullness. tough but graceful :)

hmm, about the painting ... Swans Reflecting Elephants (1937) is a painting by the Spanish surrealist Salvador Dalí. This painting is from Dalí's Paranoiac-critical period. It focuses on a double-image that causes the reflections of swans on a pond to look like elephants; the swans' necks and wings take on the appearance of trunks and ears when reflected, while the reflection of a tree-covered shore behind the swans supplies the elephants' legs and bodies. To the left is a self-portrait of Dalí facing away from the double-image. The figure of the man in the painting is Edward James, one of Dali's patrons and friends.
(sources from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swans_Reflecting_Elephants)


kalau kamu bace ttg Dali ni, ada rasa kesian juga sikit..his bakat/talent is one thing people cannot question about. but his way of life.. from my own personal perspective, such a waste he had to face what he had to face..


Dali juga adalah watak yg akan dibawakan oleh Robert Pattinson (Twilight) dalam filem barunya nanti :) "Little Ashes". can't wait to see that movie..

done for now :)
-happy working!-
sfzy

HELLO... :)

to know how to say what others only know how to think is what makes men poets or sages; and to dare to say what others only dare to think makes men martyrs or reformers - or both.

when

when..

July 8, 2009 @ 3:34 am

What was i seeking in this so called life? satisfactions? happiness? perfection?

nobody wanted to be in a failure state, distressful.. people said that life is like a wheel. sometimes we’re up and sometimed we’re down. but not for me, i don’t think so. more to a life-long education process. where mistakes made, forgiven and try again. in the attempt of striding through this life, alhamdulillah it has been a lot that i’ve learnt, seen, heard, read about and felt…

nobody wants to face the same experience twice! especially when it is not favorable to us, of course. what we can do each tiem we face everyday, embrace it and make the best of it  No, we cannot freeze the moment. but Yes, we can make that moment lasts forever and keep it beating, live it and re-live that experiences in our hearts.

when i see that tree outside of the surau (i’m @ the surau the moment i wrote this) i was thinking like how long it has been for the tree to grow there. what it had seen for all its life as a big tree at the main intersection between the mosque, and the main road of Sungai Kantan. hmm…it may have seen a gruesome accidents. hundreds maybe..or it had once or two be a shelter for the orphans, or schoole children who has finish their daily classess. or it might have been a witness for a group of bride’s escorts on their way to the reception..haha, who will ever know?!

as a living, breathing, moving flesh of human…with the akal (most valuable gift of intelligence from ALLAH)…supposedly our experience is much, much more than that tree by the main road intersection in Sungai Kantan!

have we ever put our mind to it, what will ever happen tomorrow, the week after, two month later…three years after that? have it crossed our little mind that our dreams that we built can went down the drain?  haha

if and only if we take time to acknowledge our origins, we will definatelybe the most humble human being in the world.